A Blurred Smile

As we sit on that bench.

Of all places.

The air is just getting thinner.

I saw you.

Oh so silent.

Just waiting for words to come out of my mouth.

Just waiting there oh so silently.

Is it the end?

The end after a new us.

After my mistakes two years ago?

Have I done it again?

Why is it like this.

My ears.

They are just.

I looked into your eyes.

Just a single infliction can break me to pieces.

Again I looked at you.

Sitting still.

No emotions spilled.

Am I to leave now?

You said i’d better leave.

You said that I am not happy.

And then I lost myself.

Tried to cut the bonds?

Tried to slit my own life line.

Though you are still there.

Emotionless.

I am also waiting.

Again I just can’t leave.

How can I leave someone I LOVE?

How can I leave.

Knowing that I’m to blame.

I just don’t know what to do.

You look so fragile.

I don’t want to break you to pieces.

Though it is impossible to do so.

For I will be the one broken.

Is is a bitter ending again?

My eyes then started to feel warm.

Those tears I shed.

Tears of agony for myself.

I don’t want us to fall apart.

My tears then flowed.

I even pulled out some strands of hair from my head.

Is it worth it?

Again?

The tears.

Then you said.

“SORRY”

Why?

Why have you said so?

I thought i was to blame.

I am the one to blame.

It is the way I speak at a low volume.

But then I always insist that it is your ears.

I am to blame.

I feel anguish for myself.

Seeing me cry.

You saw it.

As I saw.

Your blurred face.

A smile then glimmered.

It shined to melt my heart again.

“You saw me cry. Do you now know that I LOVE YOU so?”

This is the way it goes.

Felt happy?

For I have shed those tears for YOU?